Who gives a F&*%?

My girlfriend Talisha is the inspiration for my newest entry. We were talking today about the lame ducks who are addicted to facebook. You know who they are, and if you are one of them, you know who you are too.

I remember back in the day when facebook made its debut. (1) You had to type "thefacebook.com" into your browser, (2) you had to be enrolled in some type of school (a real one with a ".edu" address) and (3) People didn't have to worry about their lives being put on blast. Facebook used to have a real wall, where people could graffiti text, delete stuff and add stuff. Then suddenly, one day without any warning, facebook got a face-lift (pun intended, actually) and decided to rid itself of discretion. I used to check facebook and get excited to see that tiny little envelope pop up to show that I had a message waiting. A message from an actual person. Not from a fraternity or a sorority or an on campus org or an event. Someone actually saying 'hi, i think we should chill.'
Facebook suddenly became an outlet for advertisement and drove itself into a vat of SPAM mail that annoyed the shit out everyone; especially because some of the events going on were just incredibly whack. We could see who was invited and who was going and who was not going and who was on the fence and who had been to the venue, and who was sort of kinda thinking about going but couldn't make up their mind until they got the right outfit etc. THEN with the onset of pictures and albums being added to facebook, people became glued to their computers. Not necessarily enthralled by other people's pictures, but concerned as to how a picture of them half naked on a bar got thrown up on the internet. Mothafuggas was gettin' TAGGED. And TAGGED HARD. And Facebook decided to leave no doubt as to who it was in the picture, because your name would pop up (compliments to the no-life-having mofos who take the time to list every single person in a picture). Even after all of this, I was still okay with facebook. I still missed the original set up, but I was willing to accept that people just started to become more interested in one another.

But then out of the blue....without much warning or understanding---the fucking mini-feed was introduced.

Kristan is currently in a relationship. 3:00pm
Kristan has listed herself as single. 3:01pm
Kristan wrote on Phil's wall. 3:02pm
Kristan took a shit. 3:03pm

WTF.

Honestly, I could care less about what ANYONE else is doing, and I don't appreciate facebook putting my entire life on boom blast. I like to share my thoughts and dreams and opinions, but if I wanna say hello to a friend on their wall real fast, not errbody and they mama (who now can actually join facebook too) should have to know. But what I have realized is that anyone who continues to update their profiles or their status or their pictures or anything else actually don't mind if people have an intimate look into their lives. But this is yet another aspect which destroys how people get to know each other. John Doe could see Jane Doe drunk as a skunk on facebook, with her eyes low and with her crotch posing like Paris Hilton's crotch. If he sees her in class one day or on the street--who's to say that the only reason he won't speak to her is based off of what he previously saw. The mystery behind human beings is gone. We actually start to build false relationships with people because we have seen their parents, friends, cousins, rooms, wardrobe etc. ALL ON FACEBOOK

I am still a current member of Facebook, just in case someone from my past is looking for me. In between I dabble in changing my status, my profile picture, and writing on my friends' walls. But I am beginning to think that people who have a frigging suckling complex with facebook need to get off the nipple for a while and go meet an actual person to sit down with in front of a fireplace and tell life stories. Lets stop uploading pictures of our lives for strange ass people to look at and gawk at. You don't know who's jerking off to your picture. Or who's hating on your ugly ass family. Or who's trying to figure out where in Brooklyn your house is located. And don't condone that honesty box shit because if it were really an honesty box--then the shit wouldn't be anonymous.

I'm-
justbeinghonest.